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Jokes
Series 36
| 1. Jimmy was painting a fence. He was wearing two jackets. When someone asked him why he had done that, he said, "It says on the paint can' put on two coats'". 2. A couple had just arrived at Heathrow airport after an exhausting journey from the north of England. Wearily, the husband said, "I wish I had brought the piano with me". "What on earth for?" his wife demanded. "I've left the plane tickets on it", he said. 3. A woman asked her husband to buy their second car. He was sore and said, "What do you think, cars grow on trees ?" "No", said the wife, "I know they come from plants". 4. Dad: "How come Mary's marks are always better than yours?" Susan: "Well, her dad helps her with her studies just as you help me, and obviously her father is cleverer". 5. A lady went to a zoo. On the leopard's cage she noticed a sign that read--Wet Paint. "Oh", she exclaimed, "I always thought their spots were real!" |